SoapZone Community Message Board

My parents aren’t really that elderly, 75 and 77 years old and in pretty good health and live in their own home about 25 minutes away from me. When my sister’s kids were little, they were very involved in their lives but now that they’re all teenagers and one is in college, they hardly see them. The kids are all very nice kids and not trouble in any way but just not very social with their grandparents and I feel like my sister’s should make her kids reach out to them more. There is a little bit of a language barrier but my parents do speak English.

Ever since Covid, I’ve felt like my mom is depressed a lot and speaks a lot about every day being exactly the same. I try to call her every few days but sometimes she’s just so down. I don’t know what else to do. I try to take her out to lunch or to do something every couple of weeks but it never seems to be enough.

Then my husband’s parents - they’re pretty active but they’re in their 80s and I feel like my husband and I are the only ones that make an effort to visit them . We do live the closest (about an hour away) but my husband’s siblings just seem really self-centered. Usually my in-laws come to our house for Thanksgiving and then go visit the other 2 siblings in the Bay Area for Christmas. This year, both have said they’re not in the mood or are too busy to host. Also another family gathering that usually happens during Christmas is postponed until after New Year’s so they’ve decided they only want to make one trip to the bay area so they’re going to that instead. So because this year my sister is taking her kids to Cabo and will be returning on Christmas Day and we will be having Christmas with my side of the family after they get back, my husband and I thought we’d go visit his parents on Christmas Eve and then stop by to see my parents on Christmas Day. But his siblings have made no indication that they’re interested in coming to visit his parents too. His sister went out of town for her anniversary this weekend so she’s clearly got enough time and energy to travel but not to visit her parents. We’re the only ones that seem to make the effort.

Am I out of line for my feelings and any advice about what to do with my mom and her depression would be helpful.