Or at least as long as I have been alive, which sometimes feels like forever. But I digress.
Sure. People have done that. Other people. I avoid it any and every way possible and will call the pharmacist “the pharmacist” before using “they.” Even in casual speech, I tend to speak a little more formally than the average bear. I realize that’s a weird quirk. Feel free to point and laugh. 🙂
But I’m not having any problem using “they/them.” I was just sharing my initial, internal reaction to that change. As I said, I’ve made my peace with it.
My problem is that, as a polite Southern girl, I routinely address strangers as ma’am and sir. As in “Thank you, ma’am,” or “Excuse me, sir.” Only I am now aware that, despite their appearance, the people I’m addressing may not identify with “ma’am” or “sir.” I’m trying to do better, but it’s HARD after decades of being old-fashioned polite.
This is where I struggle the most as well. There's no good equivalent that I'm aware of to "sir" or "madam" or "miss" or "ms." So if I'm trying to get someone's attention, I struggle...especially when they present as one gender over another.
I go with “Excuse me?,” but yes, my instinct is to add a respectful sir/ma’am to the end of that.
There are very few shorthands when it comes to a non-binary gender presentation. Unless I'm made aware, I'm more likely to screw up. And screw up I do because I tend to overthink it at times. I tell myself to be careful not to screw up and then I do.
Well. I have some free-floating anxiety, so I could probably say that last about most areas of my life. 😬
