Top Ten Lists

Top Ten Signs Your New Husband Is Insane

10) Not just chewing the scenery; pawing it, too
 9) Bursts into tears whenever baklava is mentioned
 8) Concocts elaborate video games instead of sending a candygram
 7) Sabotages hospitals just so he can save them
 6) Readily admits to being peculiar
 5) Gives large checks to Keesha Ward
 4) Been heard to say, "Mother isn't... herself this evening"
 3) Uses the word "alas" on a regular basis
 2) Thinks his sister was kidnapped by a UFO 
And the number one sign  your new husband is insane:
 1) He married you

"I hardly knew the woman." -- Stefan