Top Ten Lists

Top Ten Things Ned Discusses With His Imaginary Two-Foot Woodchuck

10) Missing his house; hasn't seen it since Jenny left him
    even though he's still living there
 9) Stock Market; Woodchuck gives great tips
 8) Daytime Emmys; Ned devastated that Lucci wasn't even
    nominated
 7) Monica; pretty sure she'll like the CD cover
 6) Edward; can he have the old one back... please!
 5) The Properties of Time; Ned could swear that A.J. used
    to be twelve not five years younger than him
 4) The New York Yankees
 3) Katherine; keeps having bad flashbacks to that ski trip.
    Chocolate Mousse now gives him the willies
 2) Brenda; Can't fool her, she's not a Quartermaine
And the number one thing that Ned discusses with his
imaginary two foot Woodchuck
 1) Lois; even the woodchuck thinks he's a jerk for the
    way he's treated her
 
"Lois must hate me." Ned\Eddie